My Two Dads


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Dad # 1 brought me to this world. He was not an easy man to relate by any means. He worked all day, was never one for quality time, was military in demeanor; most of the time I called him sir or you. Calling him dad was forced—hugs and kisses were rare and made me uncomfortable. He gave me a sense of independence and by incident the ability to forgive. As he became ill,  I frequently took him to his appointments, it was then I  saw a man with regrets, that he gave what he could give considering the way he was raised was a miracle. Years after his passing I can understand him and if there’s any regret it’s that I could only relate to him as child because we didn’t have enough time together.

Father #2 came as part of a bundle. When I  put the ring on my wife I gained another family and another old man. This old man seemed much like dad #1 at first, not hard to understand as I was the DUDE that took his little girl away ( score one for Jack old man HA!).  I have argued with him ( as any son would ) but these things have been rare–It turned out Dad #2 was nothing like #1. I have beers with  him, I get him on my side to playfully harass the wifey (score one for Jack wifey, HA!) we go on vacations, I have taken his place on social occasions when he could not, I take him on medical appointments but among all those “I” above; the old man has given me his humor, his understanding, advice, his sensibility and above all his affection.

Calling  him( # 2) dad has never been forced, he’s an open book and I can relate to him, he’s just DAD. The time we spend together  is without regret and I’m confident when I call him DAD he’s cool with it…even though I’m the dude that took his little girl away.

To all men that take the title  whether biological, adopted or by circumstance

!!!!!! HAPPY FATHER’S DAY !!!!!!

“A father carries pictures where his money used to be.” ~Author Unknown

 “A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken.” — James Dent

About Jack Putain

Don't worry I'm not trying to be a Legitimate blogger.........no time for it and no money in it, just have fun.
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531 Responses to My Two Dads

  1. bubbagumpy says:

    OK cat lovers. Here’s a treat fer ya!
    (No animals were hurt in this video … although the aircraft might have been soiled.)

  2. fi says:

    End of the day here, goodnight good Realmfolk, oh and Jack!

  3. waverly says:

    Hello my dearest Realm, how is everyone this evening. Jack another excellent post as always. Hope you all had a wonderful Father’s Day yesterday. Peace ❤ and 🐻 to you all.

  4. Lizard says:

    Hi ya, Realmies. I be back later. Going to grill some pork tenderloin for din din.

  5. What is everyone grilling?

  6. waverly says:

    Well here’s some good news

    To prolonged applause, Governor Nikki Haley called for the “removal of a symbol that divides us”, and urged the state legislature to act.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-33229040

    Probably more important than what Gov. Haley said is what Walmart had to say. (That is sarcasm) The “Corporate Empire” has spoken. No more confederate flags.

  7. So in case you missed it on the last page I dropped the “N” word on Bubba:

    https://jackholesrealm.wordpress.com/2015/06/21/my-two-dads/comment-page-3/#comment-961994

    Jack In The Yellow Hat says:
    June 22, 2015 at 3:41 pm (Edit)
    You know you’re my nigger right?
    Reply
    bubbagumpy says:
    June 22, 2015 at 3:44 pm (Edit)
    Given your current attire, would that make me Curious George? LOL

    He immediately caught on to what I was saying, given the topic discussed at the moment, and responded accordingly. I was using the term in camaraderie ( more on that later ) and I have to admit there was a bit of purposeful trolling on my part—the purpose was to post a page on racism in America but I have to admit that besides it being a charged topic, that MAYBE I have written a blog before in the five years this place has been running, I am finding it a real challenge to get my thoughts down coherently. This may have to wait a day or so but I think ignoring it, pretending racism is not in society is worst.

  8. Tío Azúcar says:

    This is my dear friend Robert. I found out tonight that he’ll be gone in two or three weeks. His cancer is very aggressive. No one loves the ukelele like him. Was he the world’s best ukelele player? No. But, no one loved it more.

  9. Tío Azúcar says:

    The owner of the Carolina Panthers donated $100K to pay for the funerals of those killed in Charleston.

  10. What you guys still grilling.

  11. Darth says:

    “The blacks scolded me, “You don’t get to use it! We can use the N-word but you can’t because you are white!” That is exactly what they shouted at me. And I was respectfully trying to ask questions and engage in the conversation with which they invited me to participate.”

    The blacks. WTF?

    Jack In The Yellow Hat says:
    June 22, 2015 at 3:41 pm (Edit)
    You know you’re my nigger right?
    Reply
    bubbagumpy says:
    June 22, 2015 at 3:44 pm (Edit)
    Given your current attire, would that make me Curious George? LOL

    WHAT IN THE TOTAL FUCK?

      • Darth says:

        Yes.

        • Ok then. I’m writing a page on the subject because for me personally all the crap in the news and social media as of late has been bugging me. Maybe you can go all rawr there hopefully after you read it as the intent is to share different opinions not offend.

          • Darth says:

            “Maybe you can go all rawr there”

            “share different opinions not offend”

            Since when is naked racism an opinion that I’m supposed to tolerate? Am I supposed to qualify my objections to the intolerable by “going all rawr”, as you so dismissively phrased it?

            • What part do you feel was racist?

              • Darth says:

                Are you fucking serious?

                • I’m asking you no?
                  was it bubba using blacks or me calling him my nigger?

                  Because blacks as far as I know is not a racist word and from our talks I know think you know the term my nigger was used for a long time before it became taboo as an informal way to greet friends–used not only by African Americans. That’s what I’m writing on the next page.

                • Darth says:

                  Have fun with that then. Afterwards maybe you and bubba can try to figure out why he associated that word with curious George because of your avatar and why you don’t seem to see anything remotely racist about that.

                • Given the fact that bubba has a bi-racial wife I think he meant it as the observation that if he is my n*gger then he must be George—at least that’s how I took it. If you feel otherwise ask him.

              • Darth says:

                According to a guy that complains that he can’t say that word because “the blacks” give him too much grief. Uh-huh. Riiiight.

                • I give him the benefit of a doubt, the way I see it a bigot reveal themselves long before they use any derogatory words—-maybe I’m missing something here but he can make his case.

              • Darth says:

                “the way I see it a bigot reveal themselves”

                What’s it going to take then? It’s your site, but I’ve seen enough. Take care.

            • Guy Smiley says:

              Please don’t stop posting here. Your last remark on this page does leave itself open to that exact interpretation and it’s quite hard to miss that.

              I would just ask you to stick around and post here for the completely selfish reason that I personally value your comments a very great deal. But I suspect that everyone who posts here gets the same tremendous pleasure and insight from your posts that I do, so there’s a larger Realmy-sized interest at stake here too.

              I cannot pretend I know what is in it for you exactly, sticking around here and posting. But I can tell you what is in it for me. There is a community of very caring, totally sincere and decent human beings here. People care and find ways to express that. That’s a nice thing and it has a value which is hard to state.

              What I also know for sure is that I am a better informed and more level-headed person because you also post here and I’m grateful for that and wanted to say so. Here too I suspect I am not the only Realmster who feels that way, that we can aid in keeping each other on the rails. So to me the stake seems quite hard to bear. If you go, it will feel kind of empty right away because in places where there should most definitely be a Darthy kind of comment, there won’t be and to me this is not at all a happy condition. Plutocrats do indeed suck and somehow (okay so you told me) I just know Darth gets that.

              My 2c, good buddy.

              • Darth says:

                Thanks guy, you are far too kind. I lost my cool. My tolerance level for this kind of thing is below zero. I can’t pretend that I didn’t see that.

                • Guy Smiley says:

                  Actually I’ve been thinking about it and I’ve decided that maybe you’re right. I don’t feel like the argument is actually worth my time either and I’m not going to spend any more effort on trying to point out the obvious problems, if all that gets me is bullshit replies about not understanding the nuance of a yellow hat which undoes all the nastiness of the racist comment both you and I saw, plain as day.

                  I don’t really want to spend my time being persuaded to tolerate recklessly posted insulting crap like that which gets defended against all actual reason. I also don’t really enjoy having my posts mangled and misconstrued to keep this worthless debate going either. That’s already happening and it’s about the final straw.

                  It was heartbreaking reading that utterly worthless comment stuck at the tail end of a post I made about the lack of any value in racism.

                  Apparently that’s all you and me. We just don’t get how unracist that nigger => monkey thing really was.

                  Be interested to take a national poll on that and see what the real world makes of it. I suspect that’s pretty clear to everyone including the person who posted it.

                  I really don’t want or need to participate in that kind of low level discussion which presumes I have no brain or which takes what I write and infers from it all this crap I never said. I could get that from HP trolls and don’t need more of it in my life than I had in early childhood. So I’m low on tolerance myself and dude, I’m bailing because it’s my own impression here that this is a loop. I’ve seen the exact same thing happen before. I don’t want to get routinely race baited by the same person over and over, really I don’t. Somehow I can think of more useful things to be getting on with so I’m gonna go do those things for a few years.

                  Stay safe my friend. It’s my impression that you can say anything as racist as you like here because we’re all pals and I have to say, I don’t make good pals with racists and by Christ I’m glad you’re no different.

              • fancykat says:

                Please don’t leave us Guy. I respect your writing skills and opinions. Please think about it.

    • Guy Smiley says:

      Caught my eye too Darth.

      Give that these remarks landed at the tail end of a comment I made about how worthless racism is, I am rather confounded how that post of mine got used to flaunt what is self-evidently 100% racist bilge.

      • You have been here on and off since the begging you’re sure you wan’t to go on with that given the people that post here–do you think bigots are welcome here?

        • Guy Smiley says:

          Yep. I don’t believe for a moment that racism is to be tolerated in any form at all and I don’t feel that ‘You know you’re my nigger right?’ is a problem, that’s to make the point. The problem is the curious George remark. You really don’t see that as a problem?

          I also don’t want to be bullied into adopting opinions.

          • So is this the new face of racism?

            before you go on making the wrong conclusions read the next post I think it will clear things up.

            • Guy Smiley says:

              What Bubba wrote, irrespective of motive, would be considered offensive to a lot of people because it takes the logic of the word ‘nigger’ and applies it to conclude, of all possible things, ‘cartoon monkey’.

              That is not a remark about motive, it is not a remark about intent, it is a remark about only the content of the remark and the direction of logic involved. That content is so clearly racial cordite and it is primed and ready to explode as a racist thing, you see. It’s so obviously racist content that it was impossible for me to miss.

              And sure, it is absolutely possible that Bubba said a thing with racist content without having a racist intent or motive. That is certainly possible and I don’t care to judge his motive which I cannot possibly know.

              Now as to whether or not there are racists on the Realm, I have to say that I can’t afford to care if there are or not. I care more that when I read something that has only racist content in it, that I can say Hey you know what, I think that is a racist comment.

              No place is exempt from racism or from scrutiny and motive, well I can’t change a person’s motives anyway, but I sure as hell can point to their own words and form logical conclusions about the content.

              • In other words you took it as racist no matter the guys history. Well there’s a lot that people would argue is racist if the intent is to show it.

                Had you or Darth said,” Hey you know what, I think that is a racist comment.” none of this would be taking place, so yeah I mentioned the realm as a racist free zone and if bubba is one then by inference I’m one too.

              • bubbagumpy says:

                Guy, are you kidding me? You believe me to be a racist because I called MYSELF (and no one else) Curious George and Jack’s avatar is Curious George’s friendly side-kick, The Man In The Yellow Hat? I think you are looking for trouble where trouble was not intended. If anyone should have been insulted, it should have been ME when Jack made an off-color joke at MY EXPENSE! Are y’all aware that Jack and I use humor to communicate?

                And Jack, you’re a bad boy. You owe me a quatloo.
                . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qjeyWNolnXA
                Ironically, that is a racist, slavery statement! I owe you a quatloo back.

                Guy, Darth, and anyone else, I’d be curious (pun intended) to know if you think President Obama is also a racist, since Barack Obama actually used the N-word on a radio show! Seriously now, are you going to give Obama a free pass for the “racist” N-word but accuse me of racism because I merely responded to being called the N-word? And if so, is that unequal decision based because Obama is black and I am white? And what would that make you? With serious sincerity, please think about it. I did not go as far as Barack Obama. And exactly how am I a racist for calling myself a Curious George?
                . http://www.cnn.com/2015/06/22/politics/barack-obama-n-word-race-relations-marc-maron-interview/

                Guy Smiley, I hope you don’t leave The Realm. You are one of the more calm writers and you always give insightful perspectives and facts. Your decision to stay or leave is yours, of course, but if you leave because of a misunderstanding, what good are you doing?

                Darth, you and I have locked horns often, but I value your discussion as well and would also regret your departure from The Realm. You keep me on my toes!

                I think we all need to take Mrs. Gump’s advice. (Her heritage is like Barack Obama: one white American parent and one black African parent. And she was born and raised in Africa.) I quote, “If all you boys can’t behave and play nice, then shut down the conversation or sign off. All of you (myself included) need to have your fannies spanked!”

                Never argue with an African woman.

            • bubbagumpy says:

              That’s me, Curious George. Cute, cuddly, getting myself into trouble … as this thread proves.

              Jack, thanks for giving me the benefit of the doubt. You got it right. Hell, you called me your CENSORED FOR SENSITIVE READERS and I didn’t take offense. (Funny fact, that was the second time I was called the N-word that day, the first time on another website.) And then I simply saw your avatar and transitioned to a joke of opportunity AT MY EXPENSE! Have people forgotten the use of irony? I’M A WHITE DUDE!!! How the hell is that racist?

              • Jack says:

                Ok I took a few days before answering. Again, I used the N-word purposely because I saw the insanity that followed Obama using the N-word to denounce it. I began writing a post on my VIEWS of how usage of the n-word has changed in the last 20/25 years. I won’t repeat myself further as I wrote a post about it.

                When I used the word, given all you said about having a bi-racial wife and the comment about how you were excluded from using it by AA people after being asked to join a discussion, I expected two things- that indeed if what you said was true, you would get the irony of the reference or you would overreact. You got the reference and given our previous convo about how you like the Curios George I got it, other’s lacking that understanding did not. Initially your comment seemed racist, I almost warned you to re-phrase it just because I knew what you meant. I was trying to avoid a pile on so I didn’t, had I done that things would have diffused, my fault.

                You did not use the N-word; I did just like the POTUS had earlier. That people saw your comment other than as you and I state is understandable. I asked you a couple of months ago, “how did I ever think you were a Dem?” you explained that you were but because of the things you have mentioned on this blog in detail, you no longer identified with the party nor the POTUS—understandable a few of us here feel the same.

                The issue has been that you, for some inexplicable reason, have adopted the language of the right-wing particularly that of baggers– So if people take your comments as racist, it may have to do with the fact that you quote Fox News often ( Fox is a media outlet that most people equate as a hate platform ) and use arguments that you yourself may have opposed in the past.

                If I say, ‘Ferguson looters are thugs’, something I don’t think i have said but if I did it would be interpreted different than you do. Perception matters and the months that you have been posting here certainly does not describe a Democrat even a conservative one.

                I welcome your views, infuriating as they can be, as I never claimed this place was designed as Libe/Dem echo chamber– just an online oasis free from corporate interest moderation or trolls. I hope you get this and that you are not playing me, that what you say here is not trolling in hopes of proving a point about Libs—you have mentioned that on other sites Libs have attacked you, that should give Credence to what I said above.

                I take full responsibility for any hurt feelings. I handled the situation wrong; I was trying to speak OVER people instead of trying to listen to what they were saying then making my point. I still think you never intended to say something racist it was a matter of bad interpretation. Saying that I hope you can see how people made the connection that no matter that you are white, equating a monkey to a comment having the N-word ( no matter how it was being used) has racist connotation—I was too concerned in defending you that I lost sight of that.

                If you decide to remain, I would ask that you realize how you come off and that if this community has any value to you that in the course of rightfully stating your opinions you acknowledge how they sound because you have been building some toxicity for sometime now. No doubt I have too with my many rants against Obama and Libs but be it providence or just common sense people know me here. You may want to build bridges rather than scorch the earth.

                • bubbagumpy says:

                  Jack, I am not being snarky or evasive with this short reply. In fact, I am operating under your new rules. So let me speak plainly: you and others criticized me greatly for posting long comments and not letting go of prior issues. Yet just exactly what are you doing here? I thought we settled these issues? From my perception, how is this not a double-standard? I let go.

                  If you do desire a frank, in-depth, lengthy constructive discussion, I will gladly do so — if that discussion is fair and equal in the realm of respect (from all, not just you and me). But a bridge needs built on both ends, not just mine.

                  Your call.

                • Jack says:

                  If you recall a few days back I said that I would respond to your comment but I was busy and quite frankly upset at everyone involved.

                  So that was my response. HA! I called you verbose but I was speaking strictly for myself–I have limitations that impact on what material I’ll read, so a long comment with lots of supporting links, while thorough may end up being bookmarked for a later time if at all—this goes for all realmsters.

                  If you get roped or anyone for that matter into a long debate then it’s on you and the participants to hash out as long as it’s done without insults, which if you recall is why I got into this mess with others. So lets move on—there are better things to do than continue the negativity. If this is insufficient you can email me.

                • bubbagumpy says:

                  I actually think it works. Thanks for the quick reply, Jack!

    • fancykat says:

      Please don’t leave us Darth. Your posts, words are great to read. A post on racism will be hard for me. I have never seen things, people in black or white. ❤

  12. fi says:

    Morning 🙂

  13. fancykat says:

    It’s time to say good night to the Realm and Jack. Peace.

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